Saturday, August 6, 2011

See My [Creative] Spark Saturday (1) - The Beautiful Broken

See My [Creative] Spark Saturday is a new feature every week here at The Undercover Book Lover. It's a feature wherein I post an original written piece; either a short story or a poem and you guys can comment and give me constructive feedback on them =) You get a glimpse of my [no matter how minuscule] creative spark!



Today's Spark is a short story called:

The Beautiful Broken

The hospital’s empty white walls that surround the uncomfortable white bed do not contrast his features. His pale, paper-thin skin is colorless against my own. I trace his left hand tentatively, finding comfort in the simple gold band that is encircled around his ring finger.



Looking at his face, examining his features, I feel my heart drop. His usually mischievous hazel eyes are closed, showing off the long black lashes that teeter on the tip of his eyelids and his ever-present smile is gone from his now pale lips.


I hold his face cautiously, as if he will break under my touch.



“Hey.” He slowly opens his eyes, looking up at my face.



“Hey,” I whisper in reply, kissing his forehead.


He takes my hand and intertwines my fingers into his. Palm to palm; secure and at home. He lifts his other hand and holds my face, caressing my lips. “I love you,” he says simply.


A tear rolls down my cheek; his finger catches it. “Don’t cry, I’m alright.”



“Liar,” I reply, without heat.


“Do you remember at our wedding? You looked so beautiful. When saw you walk towards me, it just felt right.” He lets go of my hand and twists out the gold band wrapped around his finger.


“What are you do—“


He goes on as if I hadn’t interrupted him. “That was the best day of my life; the start of our own forever. And because it’s my last…Syrena, I need you to promise me something.”


“What?” I whisper, my voice trembling and tears running freely down my face.



“Promise me you’ll move on. And when you do, leave this ring somewhere for somebody else to find. I want somebody to find this kind of love one day; one like ours.”



He gently presses the ring into my palm and closes it. He brings my hand to his lips and softly kisses it.


A surge of unrestrained love and sadness overcomes me all at once as I hold onto his face and kiss his lips. My heart feels like it’s about to explode with the raw, powerful emotions raging within the surface.



“I will,” I say, my voice shaking. “I love you, Cade”


“I love you too,” He closes his eyes for the last time.



---


I feel the wind as I look out onto the orange and pink-hued horizon atop the iridescent blue sea. The bottle with the ring inside is securely in my hand. I pull my hand back and pitch the bottle into the sea with everything I have in me. I know someone will find it. It’s the kind of love that’s hard to catch; the kind that doesn’t just come. It’s the kind that you have to find.



Love is painful and as it is beautiful. Love is everything at once. There’s no other way to describe it.


The love I have with Cade is broken, but it’s also beautiful.



Author's Note: I'm having some problems with the dialogue...I suck at it...haha =) Any advice?

2 comments:

icrad August 8, 2011 at 2:36 AM  

I love it! I don't think your dialogue sucks at all! :)
Do you have more?

Abby August 11, 2011 at 2:18 AM  

I think it's beautiful. Made me cry, haha

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